Preparing For Baby: Strategies, Tools, and Tips for First Time
Grandmothers
By
Teresa V. WIlson
TPreparing for baby is an exciting process that can be as unique as childbirth for first time grandmothers. Once you recover from the initial shock that your baby is no longer your baby, it’s time to get mentally and physically prepared to offer proactive support to both mommy and daddy from the beginning of the pre-birth process until the end of the new mom’s recuperation phase. It is truly more than preparing for baby showers, opening gifts, and recording cards. CONTINUED BELOW
It all begins with the announcement. From the moment you’re told you are
about to be a grandparent, nothing is the same. My husband and I
received our announcement on Christmas Day. Our daughter and son-in-law
came to the living room of their home to say “the test was positive,
congratulations grand mom”. A new life had formed, a child was in the
wings. The excitement is indescribable. It is one of many times you
realize that it is only through the power of God that such a miracle
would be possible. The months of preplanning begins by encouraging the
mom to eat and sleep properly, initiate planning the baby shower with
save the date cards, helping to monitor gift registries and coordinating
materials that would be useful after the baby is born. Even selection of
what the mom and baby would wear on their first trip home is reminiscent
of the bridal planning process.
There are several issues, however, that are often overlooked during the
preparation phase. The future Grandmother needs to be proactive about
getting ready for the level of hands on input and support that will be
needed from her before, during, and after the birth. Essential elements
of grandmother preparation should include one of several things:
Watching your diet, taking vitamins, starting an exercise program – you
could be “actively” involved in the birthing process. I was part of the
designated support team and, as such, participated in the breathing
exercises, hand holding and offering the gentle conversations my
daughter needed while experiencing labor pains. In addition to singing
songs, stroking her head with a wet cloth throughout the process, I
reminded her of scripture verses that she could use as a source of her
strength including “I look beyond the hills from which cometh my
strength. My help comes from the Lord who made both heaven and earth”.
(Psalm 121:1-2 KJV)
Being prepared with a CD player or recorder for playing favorite her
favorite music and other inspirational messages can be very helpful in
providing comfort at the most strenuous moments. The Grandmother’s role
is pivotal for both the new mom and dad and she must be physically up to
the challenge even in early hours of the day. The best time to get ready
physically is before you are needed. A nine month low impact aerobic or
regular walking routine will make a world of difference during a 10-20
hour labor.
Taking time to refresh your knowledge about pregnancy and birth –
Especially if you are going to be part of the child birthing process, a
brief refresher of what to expect would be helpful. Your daughter will
look to you at various points of the process for your reassurance. It
would be helpful if you are able to use terminology she learned during
the birthing preparation classes to let her know you are aware of what
she is experiencing and can relate with up to date information.
Setting aside at least two to three weeks time – Being available to
spend or be on call to help the new mom during the recuperation and
adjustment period is an invaluable gift your daughter will never forget.
Sleep schedules, adjusting to feeding, doctor’s appointments,
stabilizing meal schedules, addressing unexpected emergencies, doctor’s
visits, and helping with general lifestyle changes all make a difference
between smooth and traumatic transition. The significance of your
presence during this time cannot be measured.
Scheduling “readiness” packing--Do not wait until your daughter is
heading to the hospital to pack items as you may be asked to stay with
mom and dad at the hospital overnight. Be sure to include dried fruit,
juice, peppermints, and other light refreshments you can use during
break times. Our team took turns sleeping and eating during the 17 hours
my daughter was in labor. We prepared a food kit that included
toothbrush, wash cloth, music for her comfort, and fresh fruit.
Unfortunately, hospital machines offer carbonated soda and potato chips
that are uninviting during the early morning hours.
Another preplanning strategy you should consider is talking to the new
mom and dad about what they may need from you after birth of the child.
Often new parents don’t consider the need for help until the issue
arises. By initiating this conversation, new parents have the option to
consider whether there is a need for help for one or two weeks to
support a variety of issues including monitoring phone calls and
visitors, helping with home chores, washing clothes, and preparing
meals. These are a few of their favorite things.
Participating in the birth of your first grandbaby will mark a moment in
your life that can only be matched by your daughter’s birth. Your role
is different this time, but it is pivotal to the joy of your daughter’s
birthing experience. Congratulations Grandma!!
About the Auhor
Theresa V. Wilson, M.Ed. is a Freelance Writer, with over eighty bylines
in several business, family and women on and offline publications
including Guide to Retirement Living, Godly Business Woman Magazine, The
Greater Omaha Parents Journal and a “healthy eating” contribution
Lifetime Magazine. She is owner of a home based business dedicated to
families and caregivers facing health recovery and crisis related
issues. Visit her site at www.meetingtheneeds.org
